Loving and Celebrating Yourself

Today is Valentine’s Day, a time to celebrate the love we share with and for others. I’ll admit that I’ve never been a big Valentine’s Day person. I have lowkey energy and often dislike celebrations, no matter how big or small. I shy away from social gatherings, fancy dinners, flowers, and chocolates. I still dislike those things. Especially chocolate…but that’s because I am lactose intolerant.

However, in recent years, I have developed at least an appreciation for Valentine’s Day. After nearly losing my own life to an eating disorder and then losing someone I cared for to suicide, I understood that while I might not be giddy about the holiday, I still needed to appreciate it for the time it allows me to share with the people I care for.

But most importantly, I began to appreciate Valentine’s Day because I chose to reframe it. Yes, we are supposed to celebrate the people we love. But that should always include ourselves. Now, single or in a relationship, I take Valentine’s Day to love myself first and to remind myself that you can’t love anyone to the fullest without loving yourself first.

If you’re experiencing depression, anxiety, or another mental illness, it might be hard for you to practice this concept. That’s okay. I am not asking you to suddenly stop struggling for one day and be happy. First of all, that is completely impossible. You can’t wake up one day and decide to be healed, just like you didn’t wake up one day and decide to have a mental illness.

Thankfully, that doesn’t have to be possible. You don’t need to be fully happy and healthy to find one thing to love, or at least appreciate, about yourself. For example, I still struggle with depression, OCD, and perfectionism on top of chronic illness. I am by no means perfectly healthy or totally happy. But I can still find something that I love about myself. Today, I love myself for my resilience, which has kept me alive and kicking despite my hardships. 

So, right now, use your mental notepad or a piece of paper to finish this sentence: “I appreciate myself because...”

If you need inspiration, here is a quick list:

- Because I got out of bed today.

- Because I can always make myself and others laugh.

- Because I overcame my past challenges, and I am still here.

- Because I am a good pet parent.

- Because I have great taste in movies.

As you can see, it doesn’t have to be something extravagant. It just needs to be true for you. But if you can’t think of anything, go with this...

You made it to today. 

In my opinion, nothing else is more worth celebrating.